One (Or Two) Sentence Reviews
Monday, June 28, 2010
David Reviews...His Upcoming Announcement
Amazing.
Rating: 5 or 6 Question Marks.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Ron Reviews... Balanidhren
Can you locate the spoiler in this picture? Probably only David can.
Rating: I'm not giving you any hints.
Ron Reviews... Super Mario Galaxy
Sometimes, when all inverted on a planet, it controls just as well as Super Mario 64. That is not a complement.
Rating: 120 stars (probably, I mean, what other number of stars would they use? It's a Mario game.)
Ron Reviews... 3DS
This, without glasses? How does that work?
Rating: glasses are the future
David Reviews...His Adventure! Character, Oswald Mark
He's basically a failed Batman.
Rating: 90 (Years too late)
David Reviews...Adventure!
Advenuring in a mildly alternate 1920's? Sign my ass up!
Rating: 10 cents
Sunday, June 20, 2010
David Reviews...Super Mario Bros.
I'm trying to review the game. That's the poster to the movie.
Rating: Rest In Peace Dennis Hopper
David Reviews...Unibroue's La Fin Du Monde
It's beer. It's alright.
Rating: I'd maybe have it again.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
David Reviews...Balanidhren's Solo Battle
Imagine this guy following you around in the dark.
Rating: Sex.
David Reviews...Killface's Solo Battle
I was not paying attention at all.
Rating: Rating.
David Reviews...Sobrek's Solo Battle
I actually enjoyed the gimmick. Who knew?
Rating: One (legit) Crit
David Reviews...Andraste's Solo Battle
HAH!
Rating: Zero out of Five
David Reviews...Great Deals for XBox 360s
Not worth the (lack of) money.
Rating: Fifty dollars in the pocket
David Reviews...Nintendo 3DS
I prefer glasses because they make me look cool. This system is not for me.
Rating: They just threw a 3 on it.
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
David Reviews...Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands
Best PoP game to date. I love all of it.
Rating: 100% (Free game)
David Reviews...God of War III
I have a problem with this game and the amount of Gods of War. I'll give you Ares, and maybe Mars, but this is the third!
Rating: Two (Much of a good thing)
Ron Reviews... Insomnia
It's like a mind-altering drug. But free.
Rating: zero out of the recommended eight
Monday, June 14, 2010
Ron Reviews... Justin Bieber
I hate how it is somehow normal for girls to be given boy names.
Rating: It's Pat
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Ron Reviews... David and Ron Ruin the Classics
OHH AH AH AH AH!
Also that one Brand New song from their first CD, with those words in it.
Rating: One failed premise out of countless.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
David Reviews...Camping
Lots of cooking things on sticks. Including your own socks and shoes.
Rating: 6 out of 13 eaten rocks
Ron Reviews... Plates
Has potential, but still lacking to the superior bowl. Although this one has some salad permanently attached to it.
Rating: 4 ceramic tomatoes out of 12
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
David Reviews...Dumb Sluts
Easy to get it the sack, but not worth much else than that.
Rating: 2 giant tits
David Reviews...Mountain Dew Distortion
It's just regular Mountain Dew, which I hate. But it's a majillion times better.
Rating: A trigatillion times better
Sunday, June 6, 2010
David Reviews...New Wonderous Swans Album
This thing is a FUCKING PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT!!!
Rating: 4 stars
David Reviews...Showering
I think they maybe use less water than filling up a bath tub. Except I have to stand up.
Rating: Someone needs to create a new option for cleaning, because the two that exist just aren't cutting it.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Ron Reviews... Jurassic Park (VHS)
Reminds me of Land of the Lost. I think.
Rating: Cha out of Ka
Friday, June 4, 2010
David Reviews...Inglourious Basterds
This movie was too damned long. Also, innacurate.
Rating: 100 Nazi Scalps out of 100
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Ron Reviews... Starcraft
Better than II. By some.
Rating: 1998 out of 2010.
David Reviews...Photo Dojo
I get to beat up little girls! Only after having taken lots of pictures of them, though.
Rating: 5 Hitler's Wheelchairs out of 5 Dora The Explorers
David Reviews...This Picture of Kitties
Look at 'em dancing! So majestic.
Rating: 4 Nutcrackers out of 5
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